Be Nice ~*~

You can check me out at:!/rockickmusic

I am very taken
No offensive or rude comments
Explicit topics ok if not exploitative
Above all else Be nice ~*~
I will always send a reply to any question asked

Ask me anything

Each moment in recovery is a victory

Tagged: hikikomoriAgorophobiaShut indepressionanxietysocial anxietymental illness

Adjusting to Life without Medication →


Having a mental illness and being medication-resistant can make life just that much more challenging. It also makes coping with a mental illness way more challenging. There is a persistent feeling of being doubly broken as well-meaning doctors prescribe the latest new “miracle” drug and it has no…

Tagged: recoveryCoping with Depressiondeppresionanxiety


Life is lonely when lived behind a wall ~ AG Quotes

#mentalillness #Depression #Anxiety

Tagged: mentally illmental illnessdepressionanxietyfear


You are more than a diagnosis ~ AG quotes

#mentalillness #Depression #Anxiety #Therapy  #Mentallyill

Tagged: anxietydepressionfearmental illnesssadnessmentally ill


How do I get through the day with howling demons raging in my head? How do I function through this much pain? Every fiber of my being screaming and howling in the most excruciating pain ever imaginable. It hurts to be.

The pain and torment of my existence is palpable around me in a heady fog of misery. I am not fit for this world today. How do I make it stop? When when will it ever stop? I would give anything for better. To be better. To not be mentally ill. To have a pill I could take and make all this go away. I want it to stop. I am very afraid this is the beginning of another bad run. Badlands sign posts everywhere beckoning me ever closer to the brink.

Tagged: deppresionanxietyanxiousmental illnessfearpainthoughts feelings

I don’t feel safe ~*~

Tagged: fearanxietyanxiousdeppresion

I fucking went YEAH me?

So my therapist is a bit psycho at times and waaaaay too fucking committed to my well being. They came to my house and got me after a long IM negotiation. They actually book my 1 hour appointment as a 2 hour just so they can come get me. They rode their bike from their office to my house after sending me a google maps link for me to map out my exact route. Google maps has this earth view thing where you can real time it sort of.

Then we rode to the office and had an appointment as if the whole IM, google map come and get me thing never happened. Which was actually really cool because I have waaaaaaay bigger issues. So they are just all how are things going at work? I like a set “ice breaker”. I ramble on about work and some how end up talking about why I’m not leaving my house this round of my battle with agoraphobia. How that happened is the magic of my therapist.

So all in all I feel a bit better and plan to leave my house again in 3 days for next appointment.

Tagged: hikikomoriShut inagoraphobiasocial anxietyanxietydepressiontherapytherapy works

Fuck Today is Scary

I have a therapy appointment today and I am scared shitless. What the fuck was I thinking letting my therapist talk me into leaving my house for an in office appointment?!? Am I out of my fucking mind? Well obviously. Fuck Fuck Fuck. What to do? What to do? I have 30 minutes to get from clinging to my bed to up right and out the door. I don’t think I can. I’m calling that bitch and having them talk me through it. After all is was their bright fucking idea. Maybe I should just skype it? Why do I “need” to have this breakthrough today?

Tagged: hikikomoriShut inagoraphobiaanxietyfear



Leaving your house on your day off. 

#SadButTrue ~*~

Tagged: anxietyanxiousmental illnesstherapytherapy works



Sometimes getting out of bed is a victory

Then #Today I’ve won!

Tagged: anxietyanxioustherapisttherapytherapy works